{"id":831,"date":"2025-04-10T20:39:03","date_gmt":"2025-04-10T20:39:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.flure.com\/blog\/?p=831"},"modified":"2025-04-25T11:06:58","modified_gmt":"2025-04-25T11:06:58","slug":"outercourse-alternatives-to-penetrative-sex","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/sex-ed\/outercourse-alternatives-to-penetrative-sex\/","title":{"rendered":"Outercourse: An Alternative to Sex?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>We\u2019ve all heard the term intercourse, but there\u2019s also something called outercourse. It is a type of sexual activity that many engage in to avoid unwanted pregnancies, lower the risk of STIs, or simply to try something different.&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.flure.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener nofollow\">Flure<\/a>&nbsp;explains all you need to know about an outercourse so you feel confident if it comes to it!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">What is outercourse?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>The meaning of outercourse is simply any form of non-penetrative sexual activity. This can be anything from touching and stimulating each other in erogenous zones, doing handjobs or blowjobs, cunnilingus, sexy massages, and things of that sort. As long as there\u2019s no penis-inside-vagina-or-anus situation \u2013 it\u2019s outercourse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Note: Some people would argue that cunnilingus or a blowjob can\u2019t be counted as outercourse because, well, there is some form of penetration, even if it\u2019s not done by a penis. Frankly, there\u2019s no 100% scientific definition to outercourse, and the Flure team is undecided on the topic too, so we\u2019ll leave it to our readers to decide for themselves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">What is considered outercourse: examples<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>We\u2019ve already briefly touched on what\u2019s counted as outercourse, but let\u2019s go through the full list:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Kissing, and not just the mouth, but all over your body<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Masturbating each other<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Dry-humping, a.k.a. rubbing your fully clothed bodies against one another<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Scissoring, or more elegantly put, tribadism<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Using external vibrators applied to the penis, clit, nipples, and other erogenous zones<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Fingering of the anus or vagina but without penetrating them, just playing around<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Handjobs and blowjobs, while a blowjob would be excluded from outercourse by some<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Cunnilingus if it\u2019s not penetrative, but you\u2019re just using your mouth to touch the surface<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Thrusting penis between breasts, butt cheeks, or thighs<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Massage that is sensual and turns you on<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Outercourse vs abstinence<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1680\" height=\"1120\" src=\"https:\/\/www.flure.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/pexels-ketut-subiyan-1.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-832\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/pexels-ketut-subiyan-1.jpg 1680w, https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/pexels-ketut-subiyan-1-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/pexels-ketut-subiyan-1-1024x683.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/pexels-ketut-subiyan-1-768x512.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/pexels-ketut-subiyan-1-1536x1024.jpg 1536w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1680px) 100vw, 1680px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>Is outercourse the same as abstinence? Can people engage in outercourse without breaking their abstinence? What is the difference between abstinence and outercourse? Those are very interesting questions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Sex comes in so many shapes and forms, that it would be logical to just call outercourse a type of sex. Because not all sex includes penetration by penis or fingering. Or at least it would be fair to say that outercourse is&nbsp;<a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" href=\"https:\/\/www.flure.com\/blog\/sex-ed\/a-guide-to-foreplay\/\" target=\"_blank\">foreplay<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>For many though, abstinence is a religious matter, and they would construe sex as an only penetrative activity between two (often heterosexual) people. In that case, anything that falls outside of the said sex definition doesn\u2019t count and can be practiced without breaking the promise to God, parents, or themselves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And hey, who are we to judge? If it makes you feel better and helps you get through the days, then let the outercourse be completely in line with abstinence, and not think any more of it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Pro tip: If you\u2019re practicing abstinence and have a romantic partner or go on dates, it would be best to discuss your abstinence boundaries with them upfront. Because as we know \u2013 people can use different meanings for all these terms, so it\u2019s helpful to set the record straight and avoid disappointment down the line.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Advantages of outercourse<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Outercourse is fun! Let\u2019s look at the main advantages it offers to you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Lower risk of catching STIs<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>You won\u2019t be able to say \u201cBye forever\u201d to all STIs, because they can still be transmitted if you\u2019re kissing, rubbing genitals against one another, or performing oral sex. However, a lot of harmful bacteria and viruses won\u2019t be able to reach you if you\u2019re not doing penis penetration. Yay!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">No unwanted pregnancies<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Pregnancies can be beautiful and bring so much joy to future parents. But that\u2019s only if the kid is wanted and wished for. If you\u2019re capable of getting pregnant or have a partner who\u2019s able to do that with their body, outercourse can be a lifesaver if you\u2019re not into having kids just yet but are super horny for one another.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">New ways to reach orgasm<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Outercourse is super cool because it gives you a chance to explore your body and find new ways to have pleasure.&nbsp;<a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" href=\"https:\/\/www.flure.com\/blog\/sex-ed\/orgasm-types-and-how-to-achieve-them\/\" target=\"_blank\">Orgasms<\/a>&nbsp;from unexpected erotic activities or positions are the best! It can also be good for the couple to switch things up in the bedroom every once in a while and move away from the good-old penetration sex. Getting naked and exploring each other together brings you closer and helps build a real connection, plus it\u2019s erotic as hell.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Disadvantages of outercourse<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Just like anything in life, outercourse has both pros and cons. Here are some of the downsides of outercourse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">It can lead to intercourse<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Now, hear us out! Obviously, if you\u2019re in a relationship, and outercourse is just something you\u2019re trying to funzies, then it\u2019s no issue if you end up having penetrative sex. However, if you\u2019re engaging in outercourse because of abstinence, for health reasons, or simply because you\u2019re not ready for more traditional sex, then blurring the line can be risky, especially if you\u2019ve not established your boundaries or if your partner is not good at respecting them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">You assume it\u2019s more safe than it is<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Outercourse comes in many types, shapes, and forms, and some of them are more safe than others. For example, scissoring or oral sex can result in some form of STIs, but you\u2019d think it\u2019s not possible and not take precautions. Viruses and bacteria can reach our bodies in very surprising ways, so it\u2019s best to consult with your doctor to learn the full spectrum of possible diseases and always use contraception, such as condoms or dental dams.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Intercourse vs outercourse<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1680\" height=\"1120\" src=\"https:\/\/www.flure.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/pexels-ketut-subiyan-d337fb8f-ece1-46ae-8a9b-584082360637.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-833\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/pexels-ketut-subiyan-d337fb8f-ece1-46ae-8a9b-584082360637.jpg 1680w, https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/pexels-ketut-subiyan-d337fb8f-ece1-46ae-8a9b-584082360637-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/pexels-ketut-subiyan-d337fb8f-ece1-46ae-8a9b-584082360637-1024x683.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/pexels-ketut-subiyan-d337fb8f-ece1-46ae-8a9b-584082360637-768x512.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/pexels-ketut-subiyan-d337fb8f-ece1-46ae-8a9b-584082360637-1536x1024.jpg 1536w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1680px) 100vw, 1680px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>What should you choose, and what is better \u2013 intercourse or outercourse?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Both are great, and both are hot. You can mix and match between the two depending on your current desires or the partners you\u2019re with. Intercourse implies penetration with a penis or an internal sex toy, whether it\u2019s vaginal or anal. If that\u2019s something you\u2019re willing to do \u2013 great, go for it. However, if you\u2019d rather avoid penetration for any reason \u2013 then outercourse is the best option for you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>With intercourse, there is an infinitely higher risk of catching a disease or getting pregnant. Those risks are much lower with outercourse, but they\u2019re never zero. Semen and vaginal and other bodily liquids can travel around your body during outercourse and reach unfortunate destinations, where they can lead to STIs or pregnancies.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Both sexual activities require you to be prepared and use protection. Both are very enjoyable and erotic. So whatever you decide to proceed with, remember to stay safe, communicate your boundaries, and have fun!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Why would you choose outercourse over intercourse?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Before we sign off, let\u2019s list all the main reasons why someone would actually choose outercourse over the seemingly more fun intercourse:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>You\u2019re horny but forgot protection<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>You don\u2019t want to get pregnant<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>There\u2019s a health condition that prevents you from having intercourse<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>One of you doesn\u2019t like or want penetration<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>One of you (or both) is on your period<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>You\u2019re feeling curious and want to experiment with your bodies<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>You want to heat things up between you two by prolonging the wait for intercourse<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p>There are so many reasons why someone would want to go with outercourse. There\u2019s absolutely nothing wrong with it, so don\u2019t be shy and open up to your partner if that\u2019s what you want to try. And if someone is asking you for an outercourse rather than intercourse, don\u2019t feel bad or get offended. It\u2019s actually a lot of fun, and you\u2019ll be able to learn a lot about yourself through the exploration of your body.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Flure isn\u2019t just a dating app\u2014it\u2019s your gateway to meaningful connections and unforgettable experiences. Whether you\u2019re seeking new friendships, someone special, or just exploring, Flure makes it easy to find your kind of people. Built on trust, safety, and authenticity, Flure turns your online dating into something truly magical. Ready to make connections that matter? Join&nbsp;<a rel=\"nofollow noopener\" href=\"https:\/\/www.flure.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">Flure<\/a>&nbsp;today and see where it takes you!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>We\u2019ve all heard the term intercourse, but there\u2019s also something called outercourse. It is a type of sexual activity that many engage in to avoid unwanted pregnancies, lower the risk of STIs, or simply to try something different.&nbsp;Flure&nbsp;explains all you need to know about an outercourse so you feel confident if it comes to it! [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1899,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[10],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-831","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-sex-ed"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/831","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=831"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/831\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1900,"href":"https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/831\/revisions\/1900"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1899"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=831"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=831"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flureapp.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=831"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}